*Emotional Management is not a substitute for therapy. If you have serious, unaddressed, emotional issues, you should see a counselor before you attempt this practice.

An enlightened little monk is enjoying a walk in the Indian jungle. All of a sudden he notices a tiger, which begins to chase him. The monk runs until he comes to a cliff. Climbing down, he comes to a ledge, which is as far as he can go. The tiger snarls above and, given a chance, will surely kill him. The monk looks down, and if the fall does not kill him, there is also a tiger below. With no way out, facing certain death, the monk notices some wild berries. He eats the ripe fruit relishing its flavor. Anonymous

Emotional Management (EM) allows you to experience upset feelings, without being blinded, thrown and enslaved by them. By increasing behavioral possibilities, even in the midst of emotional storms, EM maximizes personal freedom and power.
For best results, read and study this manual at least three times before you begin the practice.

EMOTIONS
Unlike what most of us have been taught and take for granted, emotions are not a "thing." They are a complex system that helps regulate our activities. Our emotional system includes: thoughts, physical reactions, and behavioral potentials. For example, you see a deadly enemy very near. The thoughts that occur can be boiled down to "danger." The physical reactions involved when the brain notes immediate danger would reflect your body entering a survival state. Your chemistry, impulses, and sinew, would all prepare you for action.

It is the intertwining of thoughts and physical reactions that produces an emotional state. In our danger example above, the feeling would most likely be fear.
The usual behavioral potentials in such a state are, of course, flight, fight, or freeze. But because our emotional system involves behavioral potentials, and not necessities, you might literally laugh in the face of death; or eat some fruit.

Feelings, however intense, leave room for creative possibilities beyond the norm.

PURPOSE
The purpose of EM is: Maximizing love and well-being for self and others.

By love I mean the uncompromising affirmation of existence. By well-being I mean: great relationships, physical and mental health, material sufficiency, fun, creativity, peace of mind, and all the other fine stuff most of us would affirm. Being social creatures, we are interdependent and care for others as well as ourselves. Being part and parcel of our physical environment, we also attend to the home planet and its varied inhabitants.

TRUTHS
Certain truths are not self evident, but are true nonetheless. For example, it is not self evident that the Earth is round; it looks flat as we walk on it and gaze out at the horizon. It is also not self evident that we revolve around the universe; honestly, it still feels like it all revolves around me.

Here are two basic truths, not at all self evident, that are needed for EM. They are in keeping with academic science and philosophy.

1. Life is perfect via its imperfections, although it seems otherwise.

The truth is that real perfection equals flat line, nothingness. In order for us to be, things need to be imperfect
For example, imagine a game that you could only win. This would not be boring, it would be nothing. In order to have winning, there must be the possibility of losing. In like manner, to know pleasure, we must have pain to compare it to. A life where there is only winning, pleasure, goodness and so on, would, no matter how sweet the fantasy, be absolutely nothing.
The way I often say it is:
"Life is, by its nature, the best to the worst with no guarantees."

2. Nothing is anybody's fault, although it seems otherwise.

Nobody asks for life or anything in it. No permission on our part is required for our being. Life is something that we are all stuck with. I cannot see how this is anybody's fault.
While it certainly does seem that we choose freely when we act (to do harm, good, anything), this is just a trick of the brain. A choice freely made- entirely unfettered and independent--is like an optical illusion, which looks real even while you know that it is not.

Notice the two bright triangles in the illustrations above. Not only are the triangles NOT really brighter than the background - they are not there at all.

We and all we do are products of, contingent upon, the partnering of nature-our genetics-and nurture-our environment. We are products of cause and effect and we never can really cause ourselves, not really, however it seems. The idea that we can literally and freely cause ourselves is flat Earth thinking, flat-out wrong. Even the worst of us is worthy of uncompromising compassion. There are no objective, evidence based grounds for blaming or punishing anyone. You can put it this way:

"Blame is never a reason for behavior."

Now, I do not suggest allowing dangerous people to freely walk the streets; nor am I suggesting that consequences not be used when lessons need to be taught. I am not asserting pacifism of action, at all! What I am asserting is the essential innocence involved in all being and compassion that is limitless and unconditional. Fully comprehending and integrating our second truth is one of the most challenging aspects of EM. To guarantee unconditional compassion, I have found that one must have absolutely solid, logical grounds to neutralize the almost hard wired response we all have to seriously bad behavior. For this purpose I have devised a little mind experiment that deconstructs human being and behavior down to the bone, and beyond.

To begin, please read the following question and see what you can make of it: If you take everything away from you, that makes you, you, that you had nothing to do with, what is left?

In order to answer the question we will engage in the mind experiment mentioned above. To begin the experiment, please take a moment and imagine, just imagine that you are not born yet. Things are so very, perfectly peaceful in "Not and Never Land." There are no cares, no worries, no pain, no being…at all. The first and primal question relating to what makes you, you that you had nothing to do with is: Did you ask to be…at all? Were you given any choice regarding showing up in the first place? There is a crucial difference between being and not being. Not being, it is hard to get into any kind of trouble.

Okay, somehow, magically, you were meant to happen, but as what? We can suppose that you could have happened as a bird, a tide, a sun, or innumerable other forms of matter and energy that could not be blamed for anything. Somehow, lucky you manifested as human and, thus, the only thing in the universe we know of apparently worthy of blame and punishment.

Once it was "decided" by some truly mysterious force that you would be, and be human, did you at least get to choose your gender? There is a whole lot of difference between being male and being female. How about the other genetic material you posses? No choice there either; lucky with some, unlucky with others I imagine, like the rest of us.

To sum up so far: In terms of what makes you, you (them, them, and me, me), there is absolutely no choice in the first place regarding being…anything; then, once mysteriously human, no choice about any of the genetic makeup that determines so very much of who we are and what we do.

Next, let's go to environmental determinants. Did you ask to be born on Earth? I suppose you might have been born in a galaxy far, far and away, where life is quite different from how it is here. How about your parents? Given a choice, would you have chosen them? You might have chosen parents who were very wealthy, very kind, or both. You might have chosen parents who spoke many languages and just loved above all else to travel the world seeking adventure and fun. Did you ask to be born in the twentieth century? Did you ask to be born in the country of your birth, and so on? Were you given a choice about even the smallest detail of your environment, perhaps the weather on the day you were born?

Were you given a choice about even the smallest detail in anything that makes you, you? I think not. Your genetics and environment-what make you, you--were entirely determined, handed to you, no choice, no consultation--a human piece on an existential game board not in the least of your own making. You might not mind being here, as human. Indeed, you may one of the lucky few that really and truly loves it on this planet, in this time and place, being you. But love it or hate it, there was no choice involved. So. the answer to the question asked above is: Nothing is left when you take away all that makes you, you that you had nothing to do with.

Unless you can come up with some logical way to show my deconstruction inaccurate, I guess you will just have to begin to accept your inherent innocence and perfection, as well as that of others, even those that have done serious harm. It has been said that the space between 1% and99% is not as great as the space between 99% and 100%. At 100% we have completion. It is 100% true that nothing is anybody's fault, although it appears otherwise. Any grounds you might have thought you had for blaming or punishing others just flew out the window!

It is not that with this truth you will no longer get angry at yourself and others. We humans are almost hard wired to get mad and look for targets when things do not go our way. We are so ferociously insane in this way that I have been known on occasion to kick my vehicle when it does me wrong. It is just that you no longer have any grounds for the anger.

QUALITIES
To achieve EM you will need to adhere to two basic qualities.

1. Patience
Patience, as virtuous as it is, is often tough to achieve. We did not rise to the top of the food chain by being patient, easygoing creatures, quite the contrary. When things are really tough, when serious needs are not met, we tend to become either ferocious or feeble. To learn to deal creatively with tough emotions, to learn EM, you will need patience.

2. Swimming against the current
What you will be attempting is quite unusual. The usual tide of human emotions, when upset, is what psychologists call "reactive." It is like what happens when a doctor bangs that annoying little hammer against your knee. "Boing," simple stimulus/response. Not much freedom or creativity there.
To learn EM you will need to go against some of your most routine ways of feeling and being.
Swimming against the current is analogous to what you would need to do if driving a stick shift in London traffic after having only driven in North America. It would be tough, at first. But you would get used to it. Given enough time, you might even get proficient at what initially may have appeared nearly impossible.

EMOTIONAL DETACHMENT
A large and vital part of EM is emotional detachment. Detachment leads naturally to EM, much as lifting weights leads to muscular strength. Emotional detachment is not about suppressing painful feelings or trying to make them go away. It is about feeling what you are feeling at any one time, but not letting the feelings blind and throw you. Being bothered and pained, even severely pained, by upset emotions is one thing; allowing them to pick you up and toss you like a leaf in a storm is something else.
What follows is a metaphor for detachment and an example of how it might work in real life.

"Running with" and "running from" upset, versus detachment
Please prepare to place the flat of your hand over your face, grasping it as best you can. Then, imagine that you pick yourself up with this hand and throw yourself.
This reflects attachment to an upset, where you are running with it. It is the attachment to feelings, and not feelings themselves that blinds us and throws us--Boing!" In such a state you do not have a feeling, it has you. It contains you and enslaves you as you blindly succumb to it.

Once again place your hand over your face. But this time, snatch it away immediately, as if it was a hot potato, placing it on the back of your head.
This expresses running from upset. The terms used for running from upset include: suppression, compartmentalization, dissociation, and denial. Running with and running from upset are two sides of the same attachment coin. In each case the emotion has you; in the first case overtly, here covertly.
Grip your face again, but this time, pull your hand back about three to six inches, so that you are staring right at it. This reflects detachment.
In a detached state you would still feel the upset. Indeed, if it were severe, it would loom large, maybe with you crying. But in a detached state you would hold your ground, however hard an upset rocked you. The feeling would not blind or throw you. Nor would you pretend nothing was amiss. With detachment, you would, to use a phrase, be shaken, but not stirred.

As an example, imagine your boss berated and ridiculed you in front of others…again, for some mistake that he made! Your likely response would be anger, perhaps rage.
If you became attached to the anger, running with it might look like screaming at him, throttling him, or any number of responses in keeping with being enraged. Running with the attachment might also look like breaking down and weakly resigning yourself to misery.
Running from the upset might involve putting on a brave face. Smiling, you might say something like, "Oh, he really doesn't mean it. Don't be silly it doesn't bother me. There are so many real problems in this world. Look, I don't have cancer?" That would obviously be emotional denial-simply not telling the truth, even to yourself.
Here is what detachment would look like: In a detached state, you still initially feel like killing the jerk, breaking down, or running from the situation. Instead, you move that small space that is really greater than a mile and hold your ground.

You might need to take some time out to breathe, shed tears, punch a pillow, howl at the moon or do something else to help calm you down because you are understandably very upset. Scientists tell us that tears contain chemicals that help relieve stress. Crying when you have reason to cry is not a sign of weakness or dysfunction for women or men. Because emotions are in part physical, it is important that you are able to get at least some of the stress out in appropriate ways when very upset. But whatever you do, you do not react in a knee jerk fashion-running with or from.

In our "Very Bad Boss" case, once you have retrieved some measure of composure (and, again, this might take a bit of time, depending on the nature and severity of the abuse), you could do one of several things. You could talk to the man, attempting to reason with him. Perhaps he does not realize the damage he does with his outbursts. Perhaps down deep he knows he has a problem and does not like this part of himself. Who knows?

You could simply quit. Do you really need the job that badly? If you do need the job and your boss is clearly not a man one can reason with, you could try to find an appropriate way to relieve him of his position (like speaking to his boss). Or, you could learn to not take his outbursts too personally and strategize how to best stay out of his way.

Upsets are often not about external events. We may get triggered into moods of anxiety, despair, or rage for any number of internal reasons where the emotional "machinery" has gone "wonky." Internal stressors may force us to take something trivial and make a big deal over it.
Sometimes it is a past trauma, unresolved, like child abuse, referred to as "post traumatic stress," that is the cause of present upsets. Upsets may be hormonally or even allergy related.

Whatever the cause of an upset, you would use emotional detachment to achieve some space between you and it. You would act appropriately within the context of our two truths and our purpose.
Detachment is a skill, an art. To become accomplished, it helps greatly to practice it as a daily routine.

Practice
The detached position you are striving for will be:
You, acting as if you are outside of yourself, looking in.

You, acting like a scientist who is studying you-selfology--neutral and objective, but very interested.

To practice emotional detachment as a daily routine, wear loose clothes and find a comfortable place to sit or recline. Do not get too comfortable, however. If you drift off, learn to come back. You will get used to this.
Begin by taking a half minute or so to center yourself. Focus on simply breathing in and out, using your nose or mouth, as you prefer.
Once reasonably centered and relaxed, repeat several times, with conviction:

"I am committed to maximizing love and well- being for myself and others."

Next, repeat several times the necessary truths, also with conviction:

"Nothing is anybody's fault, and life is perfect via its imperfections, although it seems otherwise."

Next, after having done this, you will tune into your thoughts.

Thoughts
Tune into your thoughts by simply asking yourself:

"What am I thinking?"

Remarkably, the way we humans are, even though they are your thoughts, it may take time to be able to tune into them. You might notice a quirky little thought that says:

"I don't have any thoughts."

You may notice an annoying little inner voice that says:

"I can't do this."

Keep at it until you are clear that you do indeed have thoughts, and you can get at what they-you--are saying, to you. To a very large extent you are what you think. It is absolutely vital to know what is going on inside…you. You should notice that thoughts come and go like the weather, in what has been called a "stream of consciousness." Fragments, whole sentences, gaps, gasps, confusion…get used to it all because it's all you! If, after your best efforts, you cannot tune into your thoughts, here is what to do. Talk to yourself out loud. Say anything you feel like saying, for example:

"This beats surgery."

Say what you want while, at virtually the same time, you listen for what you are saying!
Get used to listening to yourself talk out loud and then take the same talk and make it silent-in your head! Then, listen to that. Talking to yourself out loud or silently is your basic, conscious cognitive process at work. Stepping back and listening to your thoughts demonstrates our unique human ability to observe and then reflect upon our thinking. It is our reflective ability, perhaps more than anything else, which has helped raise us to the top of the food chain. Reflection adds vastly more possibilities for creative action than simple stimulus/response reactivity. But to reflect, you first must be able to observe.

Once you have gotten used to listening to your intentional internal dialogue, let it happen on its own, spontaneously, with no self-direction. In other words, begin to "listen for" what is routinely going on in your head. This is what we are after: tuning into vital parts of your unconscious mind! Once you begin to take notice of your thoughts, your inner dialogue-you talking to you--the idea is to simply observe in as objective a manner as you can. This is all there is to detachment: the objective observation of your emotional process, here the cognitive part.

A basic challenge to detachment is that the human mind, by its nature, is a harshly judgmental machine. Having opinions and preferences is necessary. The harshness we attach to some of our thoughts is not useful. The value of detachment and EM is to help us obtain clarity, objectively, and, ultimately, to lighten up. Without learning to lighten up, there is only the turmoil that now rules the planet within and among us. Emotionally attached, we end up playing with and indulging our most negative feelings, like we might with mucous from our nose. Detachment is learning how not to play with and get stuck in snot.

The Real Nasties
What follow are examples of core beliefs that I have found often occur in tandem with long-term, chronically painful emotions. It is crucial during your practice that you see how used and bothered you are by them.

The first Nasty is:
"I don't win; I am a loser!"

For the vast majority of our time on this planet, winning was eating and losing was being eaten. The idea of hardcore winning and losing is still part and parcel of our not- so- civil being. There are attendant losing thoughts like "I'm not loveable," "I'm nothing," "Not good enough," "Not smart enough," and so on. The bottom line is believing that in the end, you lose. Of course, up until a point of certainty, all anyone can accurately say is that they have had losses. Nobody can predict an uncertain future. But if you say, prophetically, that you will lose, and this is what calling yourself a "loser" is-prophesy--chances are you will. There are two basic ways to play out the "loser" script. One is simply to lose. Those who chronically lose do not shoot themselves in the foot or self-sabotage, not really, they just follow the dominant program in their head-losing!

The other side of the same losing coin is being fanatically driven to win. A few who feel they cannot win become workaholics and control freaks. How many of our leaders in industry, politics, or elsewhere are, in fact, driven by a dreadful need to win based upon a core knowledge (and the fear it generates) that they are truly losers?

The next Nasty is:

"It is my fault that I lose!"

The blame game flies in the face of objective science, as we have already discussed. Nobody is literally to blame for anything. It is fundamentally inaccurate to say that anybody is fundamentally and literally to blame for his or her behavior. Blame, shame and guilt are such a way of life for us, that it is very tough to see the compassionate and logical truth, much less act upon it. In fact, the most difficult part of EM for you may be giving yourself (and others) understanding and compassion.

The next Nasty is:

"The universe (especially in the form of people) is out to get me!"

Life is not personal. In life, by its nature "best to worst with no guarantees," things will not always work out. Nonetheless, at least insofar as how people treat you, how you are with others will generally determine how they are with you. If you are cool, most others will be that way with you. But humans are such a ferociously competitive lot, if you are not cool, others may very well treat you with malice. Indeed, they may grind you into the ground. If, perhaps because of childhood experiences of being ill-treated you unconsciously expect to be, it is likely you will be! Essentially not trusting, you expect the worst and get it. You inadvertently ensure that your true needs are not met. Without meaning to, you bring the worst out in others. You may become a people pleaser, trying to buy love, but this still will bring the worst out in others who may treat you like a doormat, or worse.

On the other hand, you might become a control freak or a rebel with no clue. You may swing through a number of coping styles, all leading to the same tired and dysfunctional result.

The last and nastiest of the Nasties is:

"Life is hopelessness for me!"

Hopelessness is the Godzilla of all mind demons. It crushes all opposition and it equals depression and high anxiety. Hopelessness exists when the other three core beliefs are "loud" in the head. But it too is a liar. Again, all one can say is that they feel hopeless, that life for them appears hopeless, most likely because of profound losses and suffering endured in the past. It is always some variation on a bummer of an internal story one might call "Guilty, hopeless, loser in a universe out to get me," that stands in the way of feeling and behaving worthy.

In my observations, to a greater or lesser degree, most of humanity tends to be afflicted by that horror story, either acting it out or running from it. Your job during this crucial part of your practice is to see to what extent you are ruled by the loathsome Nasties.

Body
For the next part of your detachment practice you will tune into your physical sensations. While sitting, ask yourself:

"What am I feeling in my body at this time?"

If you are out of touch with your physical being, you can tense different parts of your body, and then relax. Try this right now, if you like. Tense your feet, then relax; tense your buttocks, then relax; tense your face, then relax. You can go head to toes if you need to. The idea is to get in touch with the physical stress, tension, and discomfort that always accompany harsh emotions. Many of us are out of touch with our physical selves. You cannot detach from what you do now know you have.

As with your thoughts, you will notice what your body is up to. You will objectively observe it as if you were a scientist, situated virtually outside yourself, looking in.

Emotions
Recall that it is the intertwining of thoughts and physical reactions that help create our feelings. As an example, perhaps when you check in with your thoughts, you have one that shouts at you:

"THIS IS ALL USELESS!"

You may then notice when checking in with your physical sensations an unpleasant constriction in your throat, choked! As an objective observer of self you might note with interest:

"Oh, this is interesting; I am chocked at having to sit and do this."

Once you have gotten in touch with and observed what thoughts and body are up to, it is time to decide what emotions you are experiencing. Ask yourself:

"What emotional state am I now experiencing?"

In the above example, where the thought is "useless," and the physical sensations are uncomfortable constrictions in the throat and, perhaps, stress elsewhere, the emotional state is obviously anger. Once again, your job as a detached observer is to just take note. The basic emotional states we are interested in are: anger, sadness, fear, and happiness (although happiness tends to take care of itself, you might say). It might be helpful to state that I do not consider guilt or shame to be core feelings. Guilt and shame are clearly concepts, usually associated with having done or being part of something wrong, or being very different. The core emotions with guilt and shame are usually sadness and fear, fear of retribution.

More often than not our emotions are neutral. Get used to tuning into all of your feelings "the good, the bad, and the neutral," honestly and openly engaging in selfology. Do this and in time, and in a natural way, you will build the psychological muscles to help deal appropriately with emotional storms that arise.

Behaviors
Lastly, you will be looking at what behaviors usually accompany your feelings? Ask yourself while sitting this question:

"What does my current emotional state make me want to do…right now?"

After answering this question ask yourself:

"What do I usually do when I feel bad?"

Get in touch with the usual behavioral patterns that accompany upsets. If you notice that you act inappropriately even while thinking you are happy, perhaps your experience of happiness is merely a veneer, only skin deep. Ultimately, how we feel is trivial as compared to how we behave. If you learn to behave in accordance with our two truths and purpose here, however you are feeling, your life will tend to go well.

You might say that the value of EM is to facilitate and empower your ability to keep your loving word in life. The purpose of EM: maximizing love and well-being for self and others becomes, in effect, your word. You can also think of your purpose as a stand you have taken. It is like drawing the proverbial line in the sand: on one side is love and well-being, on the other is everything else. When all is said and done, you will either learn to live up to your word, or you will not.

NEXT, REFLECT
After practicing detachment, please reflect on and answer this question:

"How do my usual patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving specifically fit with the two truths and my purpose of maximizing love and well-being for self and others?"

Over time, by utilizing patience and swimming against the current, you will learn to keep the best and let go of the rest, as they say. Because the mind, by our nature, is harshly judgmental, criticizing yourself is going to be all too common. Be an objective self-observer about this too. Learn to simply accept this natural, albeit nasty part of yourself.

Accepting something nasty does not mean you prefer it, enjoy it, or do not work for its change. Accepting something not preferred is simply acknowledging that the distasteful thing or situation is reality…until (and if) it changes. Like it or not, reality really and truly is reality, and perfectly so, as our two truths assert.

A Love Test
I think of love as uncompromising compassion. As I suggested above, it is one of the most difficult concepts to accept and integrate into being. As part of your meditation, I suggest testing yourself regarding your "love quotient." While sitting, first bring to mind your own worst moral/ethical infractions, something or things that really bother you regarding the past or present. If you wish you can make a list. Put your upset regarding your "sins" on a scale from 0-10, where 10 is most severe.

Once you have taken stock of and "felt" the pain of guilt, bring to mind the deconstruction we did above, the absolute proof of our innocence. Reread it if it would be useful.
Lastly, see how much that perfect proof of perfect innocence helps diminish the intensity of guilt you experience. Remember, 1+1=2, no matter how you "feel" about something! The way I often put it is that sometimes, given the current emotional reality of humanity, you will "feel how you feel, but go with what you know." It is like with the optical illusions: while you certainly "see" them, they are still not really there and you behave based upon what you know, and not what the illusion throws you towards seeing.

Next, use the same process on somebody you hate. It could be a politician you despise, a family member who has abused you, an enemy, or anybody who you just go knee jerk nasty thinking about.

Once again, the point of uncompromising compassion and love is not to stop anyone from taking strong action when necessary, but only when absolutely necessary. Remember that whoever your opponent is, they are you except by the grace of fortune. In other words, were you to have been born with your enemy's genes, in his house, at the time of his birth, you would be him!

LAST
Lastly, while sitting, you will bring problems to your emerging cool and clear reflective mind space. Any significant problems or dilemmas that are going on with you are, of course, best addressed from a place of objective and transparent reflection.

The final question you will ask yourself while practicing EM is:

"What significant issues that I am confused about could use some detached clarity?"

It is possible that even with your best efforts during a session you remain confused. It may take a few sittings to get what you need. Or, you may sit and not get an answer and then, during the day, one will pop up as if out of nowhere. The conscious part of our mind is over-rated when it comes to what makes us tick. Keep your consciousness alert and "awake," as demonstrated here and the vast unconscious part of mind will do its job.

If, no matter how hard you try you do not get answers about serious dilemmas, or cannot manage sit to begin with, I suggest thinking about seeking outside help. We all need help at times and it does not diminish you or EM if this is the case. If you need help and cannot afford it, many counselors will do pro-bono work. Call as many counselors as you need to find one that will help. This is your only ever life so make sure that shyness and meek politeness do not get in the way of love and well-being. It is especially vital to get help if you know or believe that you suffered significant abuse and/or neglect as a child!

THE GOLD
Practice EM routinely and your mind will become trained to go there habitually. Your brain will begin to process information and emotions differently, without you even having to try. This will take some time, but it will happen. When you have achieved even a small measure of EM, in effect, you will have a new "governor" for your emotional system. The governor you have now is the old fashioned, reactive kind, although it still dominates most of humanity. Your new governor will be dedicated to more than mere survival.
What is possible in our incredible new technological age is attaining a sufficiency consciousness, a head space dedicated to the quality of life for self, others, and our planetary home. This is in stark contrast to our old fashioned, survivalist consciousness where it is "kill or be killed," "eat or be eaten," "you or me," and so on. In our current age we can afford to say, "You and me," and "Let's see how much (appropriate) fun and pleasure we can experience, how generous, creative, and kind we can be." In our current age we have the possibility of the Earth is a garden, rather than the global game of Survivor it still is.

AN EM OUTLINE
Wear comfortable clothing and find a comfy place to sit or recline.
Get relaxed by following your breath, but not too relaxed.
Remind yourself of your purpose here-maximizing love and well-being for self and others.
Remind yourself of the two truths: Life is perfect via its imperfections and nobody is to blame-however else it seems.
Remember that you will need patience and to swim against the prevailing currents in order to create change.
In a detached way, check in and get clear about your flow of thoughts and physical sensations. Remember to check in with the Nasties to see how they use you.
Identify your emotional states as they flow, especially anger, fear and sadness.
Get clear about what behaviors normally accompany your upset emotional states,
Get clear about whether your usual patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving fit or do not fit with your purpose here.
Work on perfect compassion.
Seek answers about dilemmas that arise in your life.
Seek outside help if you need to.

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